“Difficult” babies

A baby who is really difficult, who, for instance, cries and cannot be comforted by any of the usual methods, is extremely hard to deal with calmly.

 

• Share the responsibility with your partner and take it in turns, wherever possible, to deal with your baby.

• Follow the advice on crying, and don't forget, yours is not the only baby in the world who is going through this “difficult” spell. Whatever you think, this spell will be brief.

• Don't treat your baby's behaviour as a deliberate rejection of you - at the moment he can't help behaving like this as he's desperately trying to adapt to the new world he's found himself in. You have to accept your baby as he is and deal with him accordingly; as he grows he'll change eventually.

• Accept any offer of help from friends and relations so you can take a break and recharge your batteries.

• Try talking to another parent or to your doctor or health visitor about ways of coping or contact a support group.

 

Sleepy babies

• Don't try to keep your baby awake forcibly. He knows how much sleep he needs and you should respect this. However, you should make sure that he's not going for too long without food. If, for example, he can sleep through the night you must wake him up before you go to bed because it is otherwise too long for a new baby to go without liquid.

• Whenever he is awake provide as much stimulation and affection as possible. Surround the cot or crib with mobiles and photographs so that even if you're not there he has something to focus on and be occupied by.

• Try carrying your baby in a sling so that at least he gets to know your warmth and smell, even though he's asleep.

Wakeful babies

• Carry the baby around in a sling.

• When you're at home take the crib or basket wherever you go and place it safely on a table or work surface so that your baby can hear your voice.

• Have plenty of pictures and mobiles over the cot or crib so that he'll be occupied.

• Prop him up in a bouncing chair or in the pram or buggy (with straps on) from about six weeks.

• Keep the baby's room warm because this sometimes encourages sleepiness.

Discontented babies

• When he cries, try all the crying remedies.

• Make sure his nappy is clean and dry and his room is warm and cosy before he's put down to sleep so he feels secure.

• Give as many feeds as he wants and never keep him waiting and crying.

• Put lots of mobiles above the cot to occupy his attention.

• Carry him around with you if that provides comfort.

Jumpy babies

• Understand, once again, that your baby's behaviour is not a rejection of you as a parent. It's just an inability to deal with the new world that he's in.

• Hold your baby securely most of the time in such a way that there's no risk of his arms or legs flopping back, which can make him feel insecure.

• Pick him up gently and slowly. When you bend down speak softly and gently; you could even try singing a song.

• If he seems to feel more secure when he's near you put him in a sling and carry him with you all of the time.

• Don't give your baby baths, just top and tail him every day (see Bathing a young baby). Never take all of his clothes off at once, as this makes babies feel insecure; always leave the vest or the nappy on and try to keep his body covered, even by a towel, for as long as possible.

• Don't leave him in a noisy or very brightly-lit room. For example, avoid rooms that face noisy schools or roads with heavy traffic, and rooms that have chiming clocks or telephones.

Dr Miriam Stoppard

New Babycare
Copyright © 2009 Dorling Kindersley
Text copyright © 2009 Miriam Stoppard

Posted 03.11.2010

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